Below is a post from a female who was bullied in high school. I hope to share with you in the coming weeks some of people who have bullied stories. October is National Bullying Prevention Month
When I was in high school I suffered bullying. It started in year ten but was quickly stopped when a teacher caught one of the boys and gave him a talking to. In year eleven things went from bad to worse. I was in what was then called the leaving course which was the final year for those not doing the Higher School Certificate or equivalent to graduating and going to college. The finishing course was to get you job ready and most would leave for jobs not requiring college.
This course also has some of the tougher students and ones who tend to get into trouble. I was a fairly naive at the time and also a Christian. Because I didn’t go out on weekends and get drunk and party I became a target. I was sexually harassed for most of the year starting with groping etc and verbal abuse. There was one boy who was the ring leader and often I would have to fight of 3 or more boys at any one time. A couple other girls also suffered and I would see one complain to the principle and nothing happened. Both left early in the year which left me the main target. It finally came to a head when I was cornered and couldn’t get out of the room and when I did I broke down and was crying when one of my teachers who just happened to be a Christian saw me and asked what was wrong. I told him and he was so supportive. Because I was late for the next class the bully and his mates found out I was late and that the teachers knew. This teacher basically told the class that he knew what was happening and if it kept happening they would be in serious trouble without actually saying the words but it was enough that they got the message and left me alone. At its worse they use to follow me outside of school and even throw rocks on my roof. I heard the following year the main bully was sorry for what he did but he never apologised for me. The other boys mostly I was able to forgive and talk with and in fact had good conversations as I know they were egged on and they were sorry for what they did. This main boy I still had issues even up to a few years ago. If I saw him when I was out shopping and would have to go a different way or leave the shop while he was there. Bullying doesn’t just affect a person when it happens. It has lasting effects. Because of this abuse I found it hard to get close to a guy. When I met a guy when he tried to put an arm around my shoulders I froze and we had to go very slow with holding hands till I was comfortable. He understood why I was like it. This all was affects of the bullying. I still have issues if someone comes up behind me and touches my arm. I tend to swing first out of self defense.
I can now be in the same store as the bully but I still feel uncomfortable. I am now 48 and this happened when I was 15. The bully had never said sorry but I often wish I could say to him, “Do you know what you did to me and how what you did to me has affected me for all my life? Do you ever regret bullying me like you did and do you feel sorry for the pain you inflicted?”
I know I probably never will get to say this but I would like him to know I have had to live with his actions and that it has scarred me for life.
To anyone being bullied in any way find someone to talk to who will listen and please know having someone know really does help. I wish I had spoken to this teacher (Mr White) earlier in the year as it would have save me suffering for almost 10 months. If it had been nipped in the bud it would not have escalated to being followed out of school and the rocks on the roof and unwanted phone calls.
