Dear Abby–get it right

» Posted on Sep 4, 2006 in Blog | 4 comments

Dear Abby riled some romance writers recently with a reply to a letter. She described a romance as a strong male rescuing the female in these books (at one long ago time that might have been the case but it hasn’t been that way in a looong time). I don’t know which romances she is reading (and to make that kind of judgment she should have read recently more than one) but the ones I read there is no rescuing by the man. A good romance shows a respectful love developing between a man and woman. And even better, in inspirational romances we focus on the emotional bond developing between the man and woman (rather than the sexual one). I also write inspirational romantic suspense and I have the woman sometimes literally rescuing the man from a dangerous situation. It’s a two way street in my books.

And while I’m on the subject of romances, I want to say if more men read them they would see how to treat a woman. There is nothing wrong with a good love story with a happy ever after ending. That is what a romance is. The world could use more of that. So here’s to picking up a romance and enjoying a good story of love triumphing.


  1. I don’t read Dear Abby anymore (because I don’t get a paper LOL) but that kind of general sweeping statement seems uninformed. I very rarely read non-inspirational romances, but of the few I’ve read in the last couple of years, most of them had strong women who resented the ‘man coming to the rescue’ attitudes. I like the hero to be a gentleman and treat ladies with respect, but I can’t stand the weepy, frail, I-can’t-do-anything-please-save-me females. When a book has that type of heroine I very rarely get to the end of the story.

    Maybe Dear Abby should do a little more research before voicing that kind of opinion.

  2. Anyone involved with the romance industry–from the most out-there sensual to chastest of all inspirationals–knows the truth about what we’re producing: intriguing stories about strong women and the men who fall helplessly in love with them. The Romance Genre has come a long way–but unfortunately most “outsiders” do not realize this is the case.

    Was the “Dear Abby” column a reprint? She died many years ago and I believe most newspapers are just rerunning columns from years past.

  3. Michelle and Kaye, thank you for your comments. The Dear Abby column has been taken over by her daughter who is answering. This shouldn’t be an old one, Kaye.


  4. Dear Margaret,

    I have a problem with a Schizophrenic person whom I befriended, that accused my mother of saying something about him that she never had said.
    When I protested to his accusation, he pulled a knife on me, and threatned to stab me with it!
    I told his parents what he had done and has been threatening us since, and tells people that were plotting against him, having others believe what he says, making them argue with us, possibly one day getting us physically hurt or even killed!

    I know he is a very disturbed individual, and do not want to bring physical harm upon him, but if he tries to hurt me or my family, I wouldn’t have any other choice in doing so.
    This also means that with his mental condition, I could get into trouble with The Law for hurting him, and he trives on this!

    My mother, wife and I have treated him very well in the past, feeding him, lending him money, sometimes not asking for it back, and persuading him to stop gambling with his pay and Social Security Checks.

    He told me numerous times that he is not responsible for his actions, and wouldn’t get into trouble if he commited a crime?
    With that said, it would lead me to believe that he knows exactly what he is doing, and could be responsible for what he says and does?

    I was told by his parents that he doesn’t take his medication everyday, and drinks alcoholic beverages, which makes him think and act violently!

    I have also spoken with the Police, and they said, that they couldn’t do anything about him, because the State Psyciatric Law is on his side, and they couldn’t arrest or put him into a Psyciatric Hospital.

    It is also to my understanding that this Law is only applicable, if the patient takes his medication as prescribed, which would keep the desired medication levels in his bloodstream?

    Since he is not doing so, being a person who isn’t responsible for his actions, could his Psyciatrist be held responsible for not checking his blood levels properly, along with the responsiblity of his patient oneday possibly hurting or killing someone?
    Should I speak with his Psyciatrist about this?

    Please respond, Thank You, Tony.

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